Motivation Monday-♡Yourself

Girls, I know the struggle of being happy in your own skin. As you all know, I will be honest. When I was smaller framed roughly 150 lbs at 6 feet tall I loved it. I was alot more confident because I could walk into a store and pick anything up off the rack without second guessing how I would look in it or being insecure about cellulite or stretch marks.

So I know the frustration... along with the media's depiction of beauty and societal standards and cultural acceptance being a strong, confident and secure lady is damn near a miracle. BUT IT CAN BE DONE GIRL!! We have to realize we are on borrowed time and we HAVE to enjoy life.

Happiness isn't given, it's created and only You and I do meanYou have the power to control it. It's not hard princess, look in the mirror and cry. Cry one good time, cleanse yourselves of all that dirty nasty evil sadness and then smile hunny. Smile and claim victory and love you girl because if you don't love you, who will? Why will they? How long will they? And who cares if they do or don't because if you love yourself that is enough. Read the quote boo and recognize.

Xoxo

New Long Pony

Hey beauties. As I mentioned in my Hairfinity post, I am texlaxed so I'm always trying to do protective or non heat application hair styles when I can avoid it. So this time around I tried the "yaki pony" or "kanekalon pony"  Ala Nicki Minaj. I opted for a twist rather than a braid or or flowing hair. A picture of the items I used is attached. Note I did use 1 and half packs of 86 inch or 2x braiding hair for this hair style. 

I began with washing and conditioning, applied leave conditioner and with slightly damp hair I applied my foam wrap and gel to mold into a ponytail. I braided my hair and wrapped into a mini bun securing with rubberbands. Next I sprayed with a spritz of my choice and wrapped my hair up with a scrap to dry. After my hair dried I took the braiding hair and combined hair from both packs to my desired thickness, making sure to off set the ends to get a tapered look. Using a rubber band I gathered the hair in the center tied a rubber band in a u loop. Then with the open end I tied the rubber band around my natural hair bun/knot. From there I applied JAM all over the hair and sectioned of the hair I wanted to wrap around the ponytail (the hair that will cover the base of your natural hair).

Setting the base hair to the side, I began to 2 strand twist the pony tail hair applying jam as I twisted over and under. At the end on the pony I applied 2 rubber bands to secure. Spray with spritz and that part is done. With the hair I set aside for the base I separated them in 1 inch pieces and twisted/rolled as I wrapped around the base of the pony securing with a Bobby pin. I did a total of 4 twists resulting in 4 Bobby pins total for this style which I love because sometimes those pins get positioned wrong and hurt something awful. Spray with spritz and all done!! Try it out and enjoy!

Quote to Remember

"Hurt people, hurt people"
*Alot of times we encounter people who are just evil. They do their best to break people down, make them miserable and take away any ounce of self worth you may have. Although on our journey as human beings we can't pick who we meet, we can pick who we keep. That evil, mean person has some deeper issues than what's on the surface. If you are a brave soul who figures that you can help them explore their issues by all means go for it. But either way it's important to remember there's alot of hurt circling this world and we don't necessarily get to pick the circumstances in which it hits us.*

Xoxo

Hey girl, Hey

So many times throughout our days and nights we feel alone. Like no one in this world can relate. Like no one knows our struggle (shout out to Lil Boosie).

To be honest, alot of the time that is true. Each one of us is different and unique and in that so are our issues. But what's even more true is we are alot more alike than we are different.

I think, and this is just me personally, that on some sort of sub conscious level girls are taught jealousy, envy and other non pretty behavorail traits early on in life. The thought that we have to be better than the next girl is a learned emotion. I don't believe you are born feeling inferior to anyone. So why is it that women who are so much alike in emotion so un sympathetic to each other?

People in general just don't mesh, I get that. Personalities and attitudes help make up who you are, your character. But girl, if you think I'm cool, if you think I'm fly, if you like my shoes...say hi!

We have so so so many things in our day to day that can throw us off and make us feel like shit. So many obstacles and little nuances that send us on a rollercoaster of emotions, that having a friend to go through it with seems ideal. Some of us aren't close to our families. Some of us have no family. Get that chip off your shoulder girl and get REAL.

PEOPLE divide PEOPLE on so many levels; race, skin color, economics, height, weight. There's so many stereo types and ugly lies. I dont know about you but I'm too old to beef about the petty things. Vaginas are vaginas, period (pun intended) I teach my daughter that she is no better than the next and vice versa. Can we agree that that simple message should be enough to unite us ladies?

All you have to say is, "Hey girl!"

August Favorites

Girls...so I'm a product junky. Like, I seriously will try just about anything to try to get the results that I'm looking for.

I do the research about 85% percent of the time. Others I just leap out on faith. Most of the time I'm super happy I did because I find some great stuff. So let's check out what I'm currently loving.

Face- M.A.C. Cosmetics (www.maccosmetics.com) Green Gel facial cleanser $21.00. This stuff is great loves. It's an awesome daily cleanser and make up remover. It has a subtle scent and light lather so a little goes a long way and it rinses clean with no residue or sticky feeling. It's formulated with cucumber and algae plus it's oil free, alcohol free and the main reason it tried it was because it helps control oil.

Hair- Pantene Pro V Styles Texturizing  Sculpting Wax. Yo, so we all are on a never ending quest to lay those edges right? I think I've bought and been through maybe 4 or 5 edge controls over the last 2 years. I'm sooooo tired of looking girl, but I think I've found one that works wonders. I found this at Walmart for roughly $3.54. I saw a review on this on youtubers ItsMyRayeRaye's channel. Let me tell you, honestly it works. It's not super thick, cakey, or waxy. It's some what of a creamy texture that smooths on nicely and has no white build up or greasy after glow that trickles down to the face. It's not tacky or sticky and I love it!

Food- Dole Strawberry Dippers Dark Chocolate. I got these at Walmart while picking up some items for dinner. For $3.00 you get 6 packs (4 halves of whole strawberries to a pack)of frozen chocolate covered strawberries. They're bomb! A cool and sweet snack especially in the upcoming "Indian Summer" days plus they're only 60 calories a pack. But, let them thaw about 2 minutes before you bite into them to avoid that awkward cold shock to your teeth.

Alright lady bugs, my list is complete  for now. Short and sweet. Hope you decide to try them out. Let me know what you think in the comments below.

Xoxo

Motivation Monday "N.W.A"

Right off the heels of the movie "N.W.A Straight Outta Compton" I have a motivational message to share.

Saturday night, I went to see this movie, hyped up because I love Eazy-E and I love what N.W.A had to say and what they signified at a time where their message was unheard of. I won't go into a super long movie review because I definitely feel like this movie is a must see. Plus, you can find tons of them all over the net.

So, yes I did walk away with my own interpretation of what I felt from watching the movie. I left with some inspiration. Now really as far as music because the state of hip hop today just saddens me. But N.W.A and what they did for themselves. Literally, they were a group of talented, under privileged kids from a rough neighborhood and humble beginnings.

They had a dream, talent and prayers. Regardless of what you feel about their music or them as individuals, they turned their circumstance into finance. Not that the monetary value supercedes the moral and cultural life lessons they learned but it helped, alot.

As a kid who grew up in a similar way because hardships don't ever grow old or out of style, I can identify with the passion of wanting better. Wanting to see and be better. Regardless of how hard or trying it was, they did it.

And with saying that, I'm saying stay persistent in whatever you feel your good at. Don't be afraid to grow. Don't be afraid to change, dream and believe. You have to work for any and everything that's worth having, tears and long nights included. Sometimes it's super easy to lose sight of your goals by being influenced by negativity and your surroundings. Im going full force now, i've watched my dreams pass me by for far too long. Live life, be inspired! Love what you do and never give up.

Xoxo

Random Rant- Know it All

Real quick, real straight to the point.

How come, people know so much about you, your life, what you should be doing, how you should react, what you should've said, how you should've done this or that, what the Lord wants for your life, how to talk to your child, what colors you should wear, how to season your chicken... they just know everything...

Except when to be quiet?

Manifestation

Ok, truth moment for a brief second. I suffer from daddy issues. I'm not all like woe is me, I'm gonna strip or whore out looking for love or anything like that. But, I have struggled since childhood with my identity.  Ive been finding out who I am and what I am as I go along day to day with no real concrete building block besides me knowing I have a problem. Growing up I figured out each family was unique and mine consisted of my mom and my granny and us kids. And so I knew there was a whole other side to me that I didn't know. Which in turn gave me these identity crisis's which at times were very problematic for me. I figured out that I didn't have alot of similarities with my mom so, who was I really? Each child needs to see themselves in their household in some fashion to solidify their role/purpose in life and I didn't have that.

They always say, speak things into existence. Think positive thoughts. I did this often as a child. Hoping and praying and wishing for the most basic of things. Things humans need for survival like love, affection, admiration, compassion. To no avail, they didn't show up (i.e my dad). So now, this has come back up in my life, being a reoccurring theme as of late in my household as we have been exploring our religious beliefs and searching for answers within our faith.

I have a regular job just like everyone else, living check to check trying to make a way but I'm venturing out, on a leap of faith, into this blogging world.
Why? Because as I'm finding myself, I'm realizing that no one is ever truly sure of who they are. I think once you THINK you know, you as a person has stopped evolving. You can't grow if your stuck in one place. I know I love to write. I know I love people. I know people love me. I know i have a passion. I know I wrote and read all the time growing up. I know I used to dream of being a journalist. I know I let my environment get in the way of that dream. I know that happened because I had no idea of who I was or what I wanted to become. I had no foundation.

Well at this point in my life I'm claiming my victory. I'm declaring my fate. I'm being patient and humble and accepting and learning and knowing that all these things ARE who I am. I believe in karma and what you put out is what you get, majority of the time. I believe I will carve my way, find my spot on this very large planet and call it mine. I'm restoring my faith which was taken away from me in childhood. I know what I'm not. I thank you guys for coming along.

I know I'm on way

Xoxo

Beauti Better Buy's- Dupes

*DISCLAIMER, all products mentioned were purchased by me unless otherwise stated*

Hey homies, I have a product better buy for you guys. A better buy is where I'll basically be giving you the comparison between a relatively higher end product and a lower end product. I for one, am a working women whom watches her coins, closely. So whenever I can save and get more bang for my buck I will. If the products are very similar, then it's a dupe or duplicate. Which I love. If not then I'll tell which one I prefer as a better buy. Today, I have a awesome dupe for you.

I am not a foundation wearer. I personally feel that with my skin type ( combo to oily) and the unkeep of having to set it with powders and the re-applying every hour or so is for the birds. Plus, I don't like having to be cautious about the dreadful transfer of my face to someone's lapel. So, I found that wearing a tinted BB cream works wonders for me as it gives me that matte, natural finish I like.

The two creams that I have found and actually wear are; Mac prep and prime BB beauty balm in SPF 35 broad spectrum color Dark Deep( cost is $31.00 and can be purchased at www.maccosmetics.com) and L.A girl Pro BB cream HD high definition beauty balm in color Deep (Cost is $7.00 and can be purchased at www.lagirlusa.com).

 BB creams or blemish balms are a tinted moisturizer for the skin that are intended to give the appearance of a flat even skin tone and smooth moisturizing finish. They can be worn alone or under foundation with a setting powder.Both of these creams gives you the natural, blemish free look I look for. L.A girl's at half the price, thus it being a really nice duplicate. I personally love BB cream versus foundation because I like the more subtle natural appearance it gives rather than a "cake face"  full coverage  look. There are just really subtle differences in the color, L.A girl being slightly lighter and it doesn't last as long on through out the day. Both have a very creamy formula and smooth application. Mac's is a tad thinner but a little goes a long way. Also, their bottle is bigger so for $31.00 you get a little higher quality and more product, meaning you won't have to buy more so soon.

I enter change the two. L.A girl for work days and Mac for more special occasions. Give them a try and if you have either let me know what you think below.

Xoxo

Dotfully.com

Beauties i have found a hell of a deal for you, Dotfully.com is a super cool, new site for make up and beauty enthusiasts alike.
On this site you can join, for free, and buy/sale unused beauty products to fellow beauty lovers with points you earn. Say whatttt????

Yes girl, it's like trading new stuff with your long lost child hood cousin/friend girl/homie from way back. And when you sign up you get a whole cool 250 points ($25) for free to spend.

For more dets hurry up and stop by.

Xoxo

Random Rant- Eyebrows

*All views and opinions followed are solely mine, in an effort to increase the peace, please respect each others views and chill. All pictures listed are public photo's found either through Google or Pintrest*

Mmmk... it seems as if no one is going to address this issue, so I will. All of sudden, out of no where, filling in the eyebrows has become the thing to do. No face is completely "done" or "beat" unless those eyebrows are filled chile. So yea, enough is enough boo boo kitties. I need to talk to you about the "floating" eyebrow squad or the "unibrow" eyebrow club. Like girl, uh uh... (Long pause)Uhhhh uh.

I won't act as if I haven't jumped on the band wagon, 'cuz girl she likes to sit pretty too. Now, when I first started trying it out, I went to my holy grail... YouTube. I figured after watching a few videos, I got this. Girl, after I tried it out one day for work my co-worker was like honey (with a deeply empathetic face), that ain't right lol. I went to the bathroom and wiped them eyebrows off so fast.

Here it is a couple of years later and really, this stuff is getting out if hand. I see so much concealing and highlighting gone wrong, chile, it makes my stomach hurt. Chics with highlight bout 50 shades lighter than them, eyebrows just floating over their faces. Or what about the brows that are so close together it looks like they are always making a constipated, kinda frowning but trying to look cute face. Or what about the ever going "tail" of the brow that ends damn near mid face... Sorry girls but not really.

At this point, when I do opt for a made up look I don't "do" my brows. I brush them and lightly fill them in with a little pencil. (Should you care to see my eyebrow routine, comment below.) I don't use concealer or highlighter just because I don't care for the floaties. If you need help with an easy eyebrow tut check out ULOVEMEGZ or IVYDEAR via youtube. They have really quick, simple and easy tuts.

Ok, back to your regularly scheduled programs...

Chazzi Beauti Find

Sup beauties??? I have a beauti find for you that I'm sure you'll love. A while back, while perusing through instagram, I seen Sevyn Streeter with a cute gold cursive necklace and I wanted it.
Upon further instagram creeping I found that the necklace was made by a young, fresh and fly designer named MELANIE WHITE who has her own  jewelry company at www.melaniemarie.com. 
Her site featured unique, custom designs in silver, gold and rose gold as well as silver plated, gold and rose gold plated. Pieces include necklaces, bracelets, rings and even apparel. Prices are totally resonable, especially for the quality of craftsmanship and uniqueness of the piece.
I ordered a 20 inch, gold plated, custom box necklace (pictured below). I paid about $110.00 for it(including shiping) but pricing is ranged from $60-$1000. Let me just tell ya'll, I absolutely looooooove this necklace. I never take it off. I shower with it, apply body lotions and sprays with it on, sweat and swim and this necklace still looks brand new. I get so many compliments about it. I never take it off.
If your in the neighborhood looking for a hot new piece stop by www.melaniemarie.com.

Chazzi Beauti Product Review

*DISCLAIMER, all products I review have been purchased by myself, with my own money unless otherwise stated*

Hey beauties, let me preface this review by stating I too have fell victim to the "hair journey" craze that seems to be sweeping the nation. I mean, let's be honest, who doesn't want longer thicker hair growing from their scalp?  Exactly, we all do. Hairfinity promises to do just that. Here's my experience thus far.

So, my back story is I've been realxed since I was about eleven. I have done just about everything to my hair. Bleached it, dyed it, braided it, twist outs, braid outs,  quick weaved it up, pony tailed it up, sewed it up, wrapped it up, cut it up, shaved one side...everything. This time around I've decided to embark on growing it out in hopes to achieve a healthier head of hair. Thicker, fuller and longer. I've been relaxing the past 2-3 years about 2 or 3 times a year, thinking stretching my relaxers would give me time between the chemicals to achieve a stronger and longer head of hair. I also have been taking pre-natal vitamins for a daily vitamin supplement since December 2013. Currently, I am texlaxed. I've decided this is the best option for me as I like the results of a straightened root but the natural texture of my hair in a relaxed state is optimal for styling, for me.

Texlaxed is relaxing the natural texture of your hair with a chemical wether it be a relaxer or texturizer.  If anyone wants more info on texlaxing or a more in depth review of wearing texlaxed hair, comment below. So anyway, I relaxed in February 2015 and received a fresh hair cut(a  chin length bob measuring between 9-10 inches after cut) on June 6 of 2015. June 19th I texlaxed my hair. June 27th I began to take Hairfinity.

I ordered a 2 month supply fromwww.hairfinity.comfor $24.99 a bottle and $9.95 for shipping. Each bottle having 60 capsules, taking 2 a day, which results in a 30 day supply. Immediately I thought the price was a little much but I had some extra coins to blow so I found this to be the perfect opportunity. The first bottle I finished noticing no real difference in my hair. I go back and forth in my washing routine with shampooing and cowashing (for a list of my favorite hair products comment below) Minimal heat application (blow drying and flat ironing) and moisturizing. About 2 weeks in, I noticed an influx with shedding. I mean, real life from the follicle shedding. Hair was every where. Every time I combed it, there was so much hair. (I will insert a picture below) I thought about the products I was using, I thought it could be my hair adjusting to the new routine, maybe it was my birth control... I thought I was going bald.

So, yea your homie was like hold up, let me stop taking this stuff for a minute to see if this is the thing that's  balding me. (I had no actual bald spots or thinning, just shedding)
I stopped usage for about a week and a couple of days and guess what, the shedding persisted. I still have shedding but it isn't as bad as it was. It's about a little more than normal to date... Fast foward to today, I'm on my second bottle and I've noticed a number of things.

One, my scalp itches. It itches often and alot. I'm still not sure if it's the "growing itch" or what but it itches.
Two, my hair is thicker. Especially to the left side  of my head but it's always been a little thicker to that side.
Third, my hair is retaining more moisture. I've always had porous hair. I mean, thirsty. I'm not sure what my hair type is (I don't really subscribe to that info) but it's tightly waved, more like a z pattern for those who care. I don't really put much product in it just because I'm not into that but now it's holding more moisture longer.

Fourth, I haven't seen a difference in length just yet. But when I do a flexi or bantu set my hair is bouncier and shinier. Although they don't last too long I do like the out come and the stretch.

Lastly, I haven't experienced any sudden outbreak of acne or skin related issues due to using hairfinity. I have combo to a slightly more oily t zone.

So yea, this is my current experience with hairfinity thus far, I'm not sure if it's worth the money spent. I don't think it's any better than regular biotin to be honest. But this is my experience at this particular point in my usage. If your at all interested in purchasing visit www.hairfinity.com.

Xoxo,
Chazzi

Confliction

So to say the least, I am conflicted. At this point in my life there is no difference between me, today at age 28 and me years ago in 7th grade. Me, today at age 28 and my 13 year old sister. Me, today and me 3 months ago. Body image is a constant struggle day to day for most women I'm sure. I struggle with my height, being six feet and having a hard time finding clothing to fit my tall stature. Weight, being 200 pounds (yes I am on the thicker, I love to eat side of the weight chart) and finding clothing that fits. I struggle with finding shoes for my size 12 feet that aren't Crocs or rain boots. To sum it all up, I struggle. But what has me baffled is the battle I find myself in as to what is sexy to ME versus society i.e the media and my peers.
 I'm going to be as honest as possible.In my teen years and early 20's I found myself dressing to get attention. Looking back on those years now, I realize that. Actually, I realized it then too but now I have a deeper understanding of it. I have always had numerous insecurities and in an effort to be "normal" or "popular" I decided that because I couldn't afford alot of the named brand clothing that was on trend, I would wear the simpler items in fashion which happened to be cheap and you've got it, revealing. I tried to mask my out cry for affection and friendship with being "comfortable" showing my body, which in turn got me attention. I craved the attention but it was all lustful, which now I know was negative but I thought I needed it.

Fast forward to today, I still have many insecurities but I know a few things for sure. For one, although sometimes I do feel loneliness, I do not strive for lustful admiration. Even in a relationship, one does want to feel wanted by others from the outside but as I have matured I've been able to decipher lust and love. And the elementary concept of "like" vs "like". You know, I like you as a friend vs I like you enough to sleep with you. With that being said, I don't look for that in my day to day conversations or interactions with people now.

Secondly, I like me. I love me. So I'm not trying to make or convince anyone other than me to give me a try. To see what I have. To buy this cow, so to speak.

Lastly, it could be that I'm a mother now. It could be that I'm a women now. It could be that I know what I have to offer now. It could be all 3 but I know that my worth isn't summed up by what body part I have on display for the night. It took me so many years and tears to figure that out. I only hope I can teach my daughter and any young female willing to listen that what society portrays as acceptable or beautiful is not the definition of beauty or sexy. So many young women I see are just like I was. Striving to out do the next girl when what you don't see is her insecurities and her tears when she's at home behind closed doors. I may sound like a old granny when I say this but sexy is knowing what you won't do. Sexy is having your own mind. Sexy is being funny and knowing the answer to random trivia questions and making a pot roast while doing laundry and helping your 6 year old with homework and watching the Simpsons in between.

Don't get me wrong, I still show some skin every now and then. A little thigh action, back out, cleavage bearing. I'm not dead. I'm not elderly. I like fashion and I wear what I feel best complements my body. But by no means am I brainwashed by what the media is telling our young girls and women is ok to wear or portray. Someone has to tell them that what you think is just innocently putting on shorts that show your but cheeks and a midriff bearing crop top and six inch heels, at any age will get you attention. And with attention comes a level of responsibility you have to be ready for, wether it be from men or women. People are going to stare. People are going to talk. People will like what they see and act upon it. Some like it and some don't. Some can handle it and some won't. Just know the struggle never really goes away, no matter the age.
I'm just here to tell you I've finally realized I don't HAVE to be naked to be liked.  I guess im not conflicted really...To be sexy, I just HAVE to be me.